Amy Blevins

Friday, 20 January 2017 19:05

UGH! What Cripes You?

I just want to scream!!!! It is so unbelievably agitating when you think that you have everything figured out and then it happens. Something tries to bring you down. In my case, it is usually my oldest son. He is always getting himself into these situations with people that he always knows are only out for themselves; no matter how many times he always goes back to the so-called friendship. He is loyal to his friends to a fault, and they are all the same age having all made mistakes and paid the price. You would think that they would learn by now that it’s time to change their life. Look at what keeps happening and make the change. And who do they turn to MOMMY every single time? Being that person I tried to hold my ground and make sure he understands that I cannot keep bailing him out. But then again I always seem to run to the rescue. To be the one to pick him up when he falls; how do I make it stop. I know that he is an adult and should be left to fix his mistakes, but as a mom, it is hard to say no. I do find that it has gotten easier as time has gone on but when he is stranded, it is hard to say “nope you figure it out.”  I know, I know. You think why run and help him. He needs to learn on his own how to fix his problems. And you are right; he does need to start fixing his disasters. But I have done it so often that he doesn’t know how or is there something wrong with me that I cannot seem to let him fall on his face. Insert Scream here!! Time to be strong and let him fall that is the thing to do. He is a big boy; he will get back up again. Time to make my stand put me first where he is concerned time to say no and mean it. I can do this. I will do this, and he will be a better man for it.

How many of you have had the same inner monolog with yourself? It is hard being a parent and making the decision to walk away when they continue to make the same mistakes over and over is not always an easy one. Trust me, I know! But listen it is the best thing to do for both of you. It took me a long time to realize that, and I'll admit that it is still not easy some days. But they are never going to make it if we don't stop being a part of the problem.

Wednesday, 19 October 2016 18:44

Life Throws You Curve Balls

Life throws you curve balls. I got a huge one thrown at me on May 11th, 2015. I suffered a stroke. That’s right at the tender age of 40; I was having a stroke. What was going to happen to my kids? Would I be ok? Why did this happen to me? What did I do?  How could I be having a stroke? Could all of those things that I had been experiencing the over the last several weeks been signs that I was missing? Was my Doctor wrong last March 2014, when I thought I was having a TIA (transient ischemic attack) and he told me nope it was my B12? So many things ran through my mind! Just so much was going on. I have to say that if it hadn’t been for the school nurse at my kid’s elementary school, I probably wouldn’t have gone to the hospital and then who knows what would have happened. Honestly, I kept pushing things off not wanting to go to the doctors and be told it was nothing. I was one to believe at least where I was concerned that the doctor was right, never questioned my doctor about diagnoses. At least not for me, now for my kids, it was another story. I questioned everything brought up everything possible. I have to thank Mrs. Kuhns and Mrs. Good at Tilden Elementary for making me stop and admit that something just wasn’t right. They called my husband and had him get me from the school. Luckily he had just gotten to work that morning and hadn’t gone out on his route yet. He picked me up and we headed to St. Joe’s, where I was told that I had indeed suffered a stroke but that I was very lucky and entirely too young to have had one. Once I was situated in a room for my hospital stay, they began running all sorts of test. With each passing day, the tests came back that everything was good. My blood work was a little off but nothing to be concerned about. My memory and speech were off. It was so frustrating not to be able to find the words that I wanted to say or to be able to recall things that happened. I was in the hospital for a total of a week, having every type of test done to see why I had a stroke, what caused it, when I left I still had no answers. I have been going to doctors since May of last year trying to find out what happened; finally, in March of 2016, I got the answers that I was looking for, the cause of my stroke. It was caused by a burst blood clot in my brain, the area of the brain that controls speech and motor functions. It is called a stenosis, which means a narrowing, in my case, it is a narrowing of the artery in my brain.  Now that is not really what I wanted to hear at 41, but it is what I am dealing with.  Today, I sit back and think of everything that we take for granted; all the little things that we do on a daily basis and not even bat an eye. To see how fast it can all be taken away. It has been a little over a year since I had my stroke and I still have trouble with my memory, my cognitive learning, and my speech at times, but by the grace of God, I am here to be able to share my story and hopefully help someone else.  Having something like this happen opens your eyes to the bigger picture. It makes you stop and think am I doing the right things in my life. What changes need to be made to make sure that this won’t happen to me?

Wednesday, 31 August 2016 15:34

What does the word Mom mean to you?

Mom is such a special title; it means so many different things to everybody. To me, it means that I was chosen by a higher power to take care of the gifts that God has given me, to protect them, nurture them, and help them grow to be responsible young adults. Now to be perfectly honest it is the hardest thing I have EVER done in my life. So much trust put into me for this task. Can I do it? Am I doing it right? Are they going to be ok? Am I going to screw this up? Are just some of the million or so questions run through my head on a daily basis; it can be so distracting. And the answer to all of them is YES!! You can do it, you are doing it, they are going to be ok and YES you are going to screw it up, it is a fact of life. Don’t let anyone tell you different. We are human, all of us, and if you want, to be honest with yourself, we have all made mistakes and will probably continue to make them. It is the nature of the beast. Now this is not to say that you are not a great Mother but to make you realize that it is ok to screw up as a MOM. Whatever you believe in, draw your strength from that.

Personally, I believe my strength and faith is centered on Jesus. He is my salvation and my guide. He is helping me to raise respectful, loving, talented children that he has blessed me with for their time on earth. Whispering to me that it will be ok, that he has faith in me but on those bad days, and yes we all have those, it is hard to hear that whisper. To remember his strength is all around me, to feel his hand on my shoulder reassuring me that it will be ok It means so many different things to everybody. To me it means that I was chosen by a higher power to take care of the gifts that he has given me, to protect them, nurture them, and help them grow to be responsible young adults. Now to be perfectly honest it is the hardest thing I have EVER done in my life. So much trust put into me for this task. Can I do it? Am I doing it right? Are they going to be ok? Am I going to screw this up? A million questions run through my head on a daily basis; it can be so distracting. And the answer to all of them is YES!! You can do it, you are doing it, they are going to be ok and YES you are going to screw it up, it is a fact of life. Don’t let anyone tell you different. We are human, all of us, and if you want, to be honest with yourself, we have all made mistakes and will probably continue to make them. It is the nature of the beast. Now this is not to say that you are not a great Mother but to make you realize that it is ok to screw up as a MOM. Whatever you believe in, draw your strength from that. Personally, I believe my strength and faith are centered on Jesus. He is my salvation and my guide. He is helping me to raise respectful, loving, talented children that he has blessed me with for their time on earth. Whispering to me that it will be ok, that he has faith in me but on those bad days, and yes we all have those, it is hard to hear that whisper. To remember his strength is all around me, to feel his hand on my shoulder reassuring me that it will be ok.

Thursday, 04 August 2016 17:20

A Kick in the Butt...what's next?

Inspiration can come from anyone and at anytime in your life. I have had the pleasure of working with an amazing woman for almost three years now. Watching her take on one thing after another, being a sounding board for ideas and seeing the creativity that pours from her when she gets on a role has really opened my eyes to countless possibilities for me. She gets me thinking. What do I have to offer? What is there for me to do? She has shown me that I do have something to offer others. That maybe just maybe someone out there could benefit from what I have to say. We have all been through something in life and maybe what I have done thus far in my life can help someone deal with what they are going through. We all need that inspiration from time to time to kick us in the butt and say Hey, What are you waiting for, GET a move on, already! She was the motivation that kicked me in the butt and said go for it. To stand up and say that it is time it stop saying that life is ok the way it is. So with her help, I’ve decided to put my life out there for others. So that hopefully someone will read this and learn from my discoveries: to open their eyes to things that they may have never thought of before. This is a journey for me and I’m already feeling as though this is what I am supposed to do. My God, is leading me to this path and I hope that you will take a walk with me.

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